Today was a good day...

It wasn't too stressful, it wasn't too long or too short...it was just right. And tomorrow Doug comes home and all will be right in the world. It's hard not to talk to him every day. Oh, we have been doing the texting and the emailing and a few calls now and then, but my life is so boring without him around.

Zach's baseball team finally one a game. It was a blow out and was good for the boys' egos. They needed it because we are usually the ones getting spanked. Badly!

I went to Target yesterday to get a few things we needed and it made me want to Christmas shop. I found this really cool glass candle holder thing--I used to have one that was broken by my son and his friends when they were playing something inside the house that they shouldn't and I was devastated. Not only because it cost $60, but because I loved that thing. I wouldn't go by myself another one, because well...money doesn't grow on trees and what if it got broken again? So yesterday at Target--they had them--for $15. I wanted to buy 2 or 3. Ha. I bought one for myself and I'm thinking about going back to get one each for both of my sister in laws for Christmas. At that price I can buy potpourri and a candle and still be under my $25 Christmas present budget. Awesome. Hope they have some still this weekend after we get paid. That will be 2 presents I don't have to worry about.

Also I am going to pick up a couple of small things for Zach. He and his friends were in the yard last weekend for hours and hours playing base ball with tennis balls. They were using multiple things for bases including baseball caps, my hummingbird feeder (that one disturbed me) and big sticks and such. Guess what? Target has bases for 12.99--that's a good deal. I'm always looking for things for him. I'm on the lookout for a binder for his baseball cards that the outside actually looks like a baseball. I've seen them somewhere and now can't find them. Dang, I hate that.

It's the start of another crappy week...

Pardon my pessimissim all ready. I am just having a real rough time with my new boss at work. He insulted me pretty bad last Monday and now everything he says and does is like salt in that wound. I just can't seem to work past it. I don't know if I want to. I hate to give up already, but man...I don't want to be miserable either.

Doug is gone again this week and I have 3 baseball games, a middle school open house and 3 church meetings this week. On top of that I have to help with homework and manage the kids so that they are getting their chores done on top of school work and then getting showers and to bed on time. Oh, and did I mention that we have a double header on Saturday morning and we are hosting cards at our house at 5:30. So on top of everything else I am trying to get/keep my house cleaned before then. I don't want to wait until Friday and try to do it all.

And my husband who is 3 hours away's answer is to "relax" and "take it easy". I love you honey, but...telling that to someone who is freaking out about things isn't really a very good idea. Or you will see that she will freak out on you--like she did. Ha. I bet he's thinking...Psycho b! I know I am. Did I mention that it's that time of the month? Are you seeing a picture here?

Zach pitched the second game last night and in one inning gave up 12 runs. It was absolutely horrible. I can't even believe the coach let him stay in. The team we played was phenomenal though--I could tell that they were mostly 8th graders--or giants--I'm not sure which. I only remember 3 infield balls being hit--the rest were in left and center field--way out in left and center field. It was heart breaking for Zach. I told him not to feel too bad, the pitcher in the first game did the same thing. No game tonight--just practice.

I'm off to open house tonight. Here's hoping that he gets home from practice in time to eat supper and start on his homework before I leave for that...UGH!

Are kids stupider nowadays...

or is it just mine in particular. So last night I was upstairs working on my wedding scrapbook--yes I know I have been married for 16 years--I'm slow okay, any way I'm working away and I hear laughter and it sounds like the kids are having a good time. It couldn't have been more than a few minutes later and all of a sudden there is screaming and I hear the sounds of flesh hitting flesh and then crying, oh and also a thundering of foot steps--you know like someone is chasing the other. So I come down the stairs--not quietly mind you to investigate and they are still going at it. Of course they only pick the times when there is one parent at home to go at it, but why did it have to be me. Ha. So, suffice to say, they both had to go to bed early last night and they lost their phones until Saturday.

Now I remember when my sister and I had a knock down drag out it was when neither one of our parents were home. Then you can do all the bitch slapping and hair pulling that you want. Well, apparently my kids don't care who's home when the mood strikes them. Like I said, they are stupid.

School has started!

And not a moment too soon. Ha. My sanity was starting to go. Not that I have that much any way. Ha.

Went yesterday and picked up some books at the library. I'm hoping to get through a few in the next couple of weeks. I use reading as a de-stresser, but lately I haven't even picked up a book. I need to get back up into my scrap room too and do a few pages or even organize something.

Today was my son's first day of middle school and my daughter's first day of high school. I feel so old right now. My daughter was lying in bed with me last night (while I was trying to read) and was nervous becuase she hadn't looked where her classrooms were while we were at registration. And I was trying to be a good person and not say "I told you so". So I reassured her with "You'll be fine", "you can ask someone where stuff is" yada yada. I don't think that really assured her though because she said, "mom, tell me some horror stories of your first day of high school". Sadly I had to tell her that I didn't have any--I didn't want to tell her that I don't remember back that far. Ha. It's the old thing again.

Zach on the other hand was extremely excited to go and didn't have any worries what-so-ever. He came home to tell me that he had 4 favorite teachers so far (out of 7) and that he got his lock opened 5 out of 5 times. Those must have been his worries.

Doug is in Quincy all this week for ADM. He will be back for the weekend only to go back on Monday. Hopefully it will just be for 2 weeks. He told me last weekend that he might have to go back to Amsterdam this year in the fall. I asked him if he realized that it was almost fall....

Summer's Almost Over...

It's hard to believe that in one week the kids will be back in school. This summer flew by. They usually do. Zach is on the middle school baseball team so his games start this Saturday and there are 15 games in the next 4 weeks. Yikes. Doug is going on a business trip next week too. Why is it that he always has to go somewhere for work when there are things going on in our life--leaving me to handle it alone. Frustration! I can handle it--it just pisses me off. Ha.

I volunteered to work at high school registration yesterday from 2:00-6:00pm. UGH! It's been a while since I volunteered so I was a little rusty. It seemed like the longest 4 hours ever. It wasn't of course, but I like to complain. I met some of the parents. I really wanted to do it to see who some of the kids were. I'm nosey like that. I was scoping some cute freshman and sophomore boys out for Kate. No juniors or seniors for her this year. (Is that wishful thinking?) And I bought her yearbook. $50.00. Is that unreal or what? I can't remember what mine cost, but yikes.

I go to speak with Zach's 6th grade teachers Monday at 1:30 to talk about his diabetes. I think that will be relatively easy to do w/o Doug. ha. Pissy again!

I'm going to try to enjoy the rest of the summer--the whole last week of it. Ha. I realize it actualy goes through 22nd--I'm just being pissy again.

Could it be possible?

That my little baby girl is going into high school? I still remember when I was a freshman in high school. I told Doug that today was almost worse than signing her up for kindergarten. No tears this year, but plenty of butterflies for her. The good thing about her having a July birthday is that she won't get her permit this year--she'll have to wait until 1st semester next year. Whew!

We also met with Zach's middle school principal today before registration to talk about his diabetes. It makes me a little nervous only because he will be changing classes this year and there won't be one teacher keeping track of him--there will be 7. He is a responsible boy so I should trust that it will be fine. It's just the mother in me.

I struggle...

With my kids, my job, myself and with my life. Do you ever feel like you aren't a grown up yet or am I the only one? I am steadily approaching 39 and some days I don't feel a day over 15. It seems weird in the aspect that I run a family and a home but I don't feel like a accomplish much in life. I also have trouble with conflict and seeing that I am somebody. How do I overcome all the chaos that I feel and help my kids overcome and conquer all the stresses that they will face in life? I struggle with it on a daily basis. I keep hearing that people find out who they really are in their 30s. So far I am still desparately seeking that person that I truly am. I'm bold--but not really. I'm funny--but not in a positive way. I'm organized--but only sometimes. I'm happy--but it is mostly when I am alone. I'm crafty--but don't give myself enough credit. I'm mostly grumpy, tempermental, prone to hysterics and mad at the world. None of the things I truly want to be. None of the feelings I want my children to have when they grow up--I don't want them to be like me in the feelings department. I will keep thinking on this subject as I struggle...

Why do I love blogs so much?

And why do I spend most of the time I am on the computer looking at blogs. I've decided I love to read other peoples thoughts. It's like taking a look into someone's journal. I mostly read real moms who struggle with the same problems I have, some are really good photographers (which I am not) some are very thrifty and some are very crafty. I even have a few scrapbook "celebrities" I read regularly. Some times I check there blogs a few times a day--like they have the time to post once a day not alone twice. It's an obsession with me.

I even enjoy blogging. Because I love to write and always have and it is much easier to type out a bunch of words than sit and write in my journal. I try to do that too though--I want my kids to read my words--in my own handwriting when I am gone. I always thought I would write a book some day. You know, I might still do that...who knows.

I'm off to stalk--I mean read some more. Ha.

I'm a brunette again!

Well, I went back to my natural color tonight. But it is so dark. I'm tired of paying too much money to get my hair highlighted and lowlighted. It's time to be boring old brunette Lori again. It's weird to catch myself in the mirror though. I keep thinking "who is this person" looking at me. Oh, and I got bangs. I wanted long bangs--but got freakishly short ones. They look okay, but come on. Cut it like I want it. Anyway, this is my plan to save $100 every time I go to the hairdresser. It will stay brown for awhile--unless of course I have gray hairs in the real color and then I am back to the bottle. Ha.

I worked on my wedding scrapbook today. It's only been 16 years--will I ever finish it? I actually just started the album. 3 years ago. It's frustrating to have that still on my to do list. So, my goal is to get it finished--all the way--by the time the summer is over. And just to clarify, my summer is over on September 21--or whatever day in September summer officially ends. That gives me more than a month. Surely I can finish it by then.

Went to the library with the kids when I got home from work yesterday afternoon. They have both already finished one of the books they got. Yes. I said both my kids read a whole book in one day. Write it down. Ha. I didn't think they had it in them. They are like me. They had to ride their bikes back to the library today to get more books. Yeah. I got 4 yesterday. I will be lucky to get them all read in the 2 weeks. I did start one today at the hairdresser--I'm already on page 75. I need to go so I can get a few minutes reading in before I go to bed.

I can't wait until school starts so I can get back on MY schedule!

Is it fall yet?

It feels like it. All this non-hot weather has really gotten me in the mood for getting my fall decorations out. I still have almost 2 more months until it actually is fall.

We went down to my Grandma Bright's yesterday to get this huge cabinet/bookcase that was in her and my grandpa's garage. One time before she passed away I was out in the garage with my mom and noticed this cabinet that I fell in love with. My grandpa was a mechanic and he had it loaded down with all sorts of parts and garage what not. No one in my family sees what I do in the cabinet. They are all shocked that I want it. To them it is just a piece of junk. Wait until Doug gets done with it. He is in the process of painting it right at this minute. I am going to try to wrestle it upstairs and put it in my scrap area and load it up with some of my own what not. And when it is all decorated I am going to take a picture of it and email it to everyone so that they know I am not crazy.

Speaking of treasures from Grandma and Grandpa's...I also got a painted pink stool that used to sit in my Great Grandma's front porch area and it held a basket to catch the mail from her slot. (I have the basket too--I have had it for most of my life though--it was what I used for my baby's cradle when I was little) Anyway back to the stool, it was the extra seat all of us kids used when there weren't any other chairs at the dinner table. I also got this cool retro table cloth--my mother said was ugly. It has turquoise, salmon pink and a tan color in the designs on it. I won't use it in the house--it doesn't got with my decor, but I will use it on my porch or at a picnic or whatever. I will think of my Gram every time I use it. I got a old tablecloth from Doug's grandma's stuff when she passed away too along with some cool doilies--some are crocheted and some have embroidery work on them. I love old stuff. I have visions some day of making them into cool pillows for the porch. That is on my to do list--maybe when the kids are gone.

Only 8 more days until school registration and then another 8 days after that for school to start. I am ready. It's good to have time without a routine, but I am a woman who likes routine and I have had enough of a summer with no schedules. Plus I also like my time alone and I can count on one hand how many times I have had to myself this summer. I need my own time in a house without kids and a husband. No offense family!

Heading to the library tomorrow to get a couple books to read. I'm hoping the kids will go along with me and get a few to read themselves.